Haka lyrics - Kapo o Pango and Ka Mate [+video]

As promised in Episode 34, the lyrics to the two All Black hakas (and video, so you can learn the actions too)...

Kapo o pango

(This haka was first performed by the All Blacks versus South Africa on 27 August 2005 at Carisbrook, Dunedin. The All Blacks won 31 - 27. This haka was written by Ngati Porou's Derek Lardelli. This haka will only be performed before special test matches.)



[Bold denotes the leader's call, italics for the team's response]

Kapa o pango kia whakawhenua au i ahau!
Hi aue, hi!

Ko Aotearoa e ngunguru nei!
Au, au, aue ha!

Ko Kapa o Pango e ngunguru nei!
Au, au, aue ha!

I ahaha!
Ka tu te ihiihi
Ka tu te wanawana
Ki runga ki te rangi e tu iho nei, tu iho nei, hi!

Ponga ra!
Kapa o Pango, aue hi!
Ponga ra!
Kapa o Pango, aue hi, ha!

Translation:

Let me become one with the land
This is our land that rumbles
And it's my time! It's my moment!
This defines us as the All Blacks
It's my time! It's my moment!
Our dominance
Our supremacy will triumph
And will be placed on high
Silver fern!
All Blacks!
Silver fern!
All Blacks!

Ka Mate

Ringa pakia
Uma tiraha
Turi whatia
Hope whai ake
Waewae takahia kia kino

Ka Mate! Ka Mate!
Ka Ora! Ka Ora!
Tenei te ta ngata puhuru huru
Nana nei i tiki mai

Whakawhiti te ra
A upane ka upane!
A upane kaupane whiti te ra!
Hi!!

Translation...
It is death! It is death!
It is life! It is life!
This is the hairy person
Who caused the sun to shine
Keep abreast! Keep abreast
The rank! Hold fast!
Into the sun that shines!

Nate Robinson blocks Yao Ming

5'9" guard Nate Robinson climbs up, and up, to block 7'6" superstar centre Yao Ming, in one of the plays of the week. Never mind the body check and subsequent eye-poke Ming wore during the play, as the commentator points out: "that's a clean block."

Did I score or what?

Mark Lewis of the Cardiff Blues takes a flying headbutt to the side of the face as he goes in for a try, and gets knocked senseless as a result. The first thing he asks when coming around: "Did I score or what?". Legend.



(Love the Welsh commentary, and good to see ex-Cantab boy Benny Blair helping set up the try with a nice little in-pass).

Japanese yo-yo champion: Takayasu Tanaka

Because we don't have enough yo-yo coverage here on the Dropkicks...

The Haka Controversy

Graham Henry, some guy from the Welsh Rugby Union, and Richie McCaw have their say...

Whoops

What happens when you employ the Dumb & Dumber as your stretcher-bearers...?

Wales v. Canada: 17 November - video highlights

With the All Blacks taking on Wales this weekend at Millennium Stadium in Cardiff, how are the Welsh shaping up? Here's some highlights of their most recent international, against Canada, which they won in convincing fashion: 61 - 26.

Soundtrack by good 'ol Shirley Bassey...

Dick of the Week Alert! EMI Records.

Is there anyone left on the planet that the major-label music industry hasn't pissed off yet? Latest victims: sports fans. From ABC Sports...

Giant music publishing company EMI has threatened legal action against Australian sporting fans group The Fanatics.

EMI says The Fanatics' Ashes songbook breached copyright because it included altered lyrics to songs such as Go West by the Village People and Daydream Believer by The Monkees.

I mean, really, can you even apply copyright to 'altered lyrics'? Especially ones as good as these (sing to the tune of Daydream Believer)...

Cheer up Michael Vaughan,
How bad must it be,
To a be a poor pommie whinger,
And you're watching on TV?

Brilliant.

Fanatics founder Warren Livingstone was equally baffled by EMI's actions, and said the group had removed the songs from its website and was considering what to do with 100,000 booklets that have already printed.

We need to work out whether we have to shred these or whether we can in fact hand them out outside the ground. We're giving them out for free so it's a little bit astounding actually. We're just a supporter group, we're just trying to have a little bit of fun and so to have this action from EMI seems pretty heavy-handed.

Too right. What next, suing Liverpool supporters for singing "Ferry Cross the Mersey"? EMI - Dicks of the Week? Stong contenders so far.

UPDATE: EMI are still dicks, but at least they're backing down in this instance. The Fanatics songbook apparently isn't in breach of copyright (as we suspected), and is now available for download from the Fanatics website. Nice one.

The Dropkicks - Episode 33

The latest podcast is now up!

Direct to you from the floor of Triple T's new abode, because he has no furniture, the Dropkicks bring you more rugby and sporting action than you can shake a stick at. From around the world: Rugby World Cup qualifiers; November Internationals; Athlete of the Week; a new inductee into the Sporting Hall of Infamy; the Movember Competition and a Last Word...

Episode 33 (right click, save target as...)

The ten best Ashes sledges

1. Mark Waugh to Jimmy Ormond on his Test debut, 2001: "Mate, what are you doing out here? There's no way you're good enough to play for England."
   Ormond: "Maybe not, but at least I'm the best player in my own family."


2. Merv Hughes to Graeme Hick et al: "Mate, if you just turn the bat over you'll find the instructions on the other side."


3. Hughes again: "Does your husband play cricket as well?"


4. Mike Atherton, on Merv Hughes: "I couldn't work out what he was saying, except that every sledge ended with 'arsewipe'."


5. Dennis Lillee to Mike Gatting: "Hell, Gatt, move out of the way. I can't see the stumps."


6. Derek Randall to Lillee, after taking a glancing blow to the head: "No good hitting me there, mate, nothing to damage."


7. Ian Healy, placing a fielder yards away at cover when Nasser Hussain was batting: "Let's have you right under Nasser's nose."


8. Tony Greig, England's South African-born captain, to the young David Hookes, 1977: "When are your balls going to drop, Sonny?"
   Hookes: "I don't know, but at least I'm playing cricket for my own country." Hookes hit Greig for five consecutive fours.


9. Rod Marsh, late Seventies: "How's your wife and my kids?"
   Ian Botham: "The wife's fine - the kids are retarded."


10. Bill Woodfull, Australia's captain in the Bodyline series of 1932-33, responding to Douglas Jardine's complaint that a slip fielder had sworn at him: "All right, which one of you bastards called this bastard a bastard?"

[via Mike on Cricket]

Leon Washington - flipping the bird, or not.

As mentioned in the Episode 33 podcast, the 'controversial' Leon Washington sports trading card. The Washington Post picks up the story...

A Bowman "Signs of the Future" autographed card, issued by The Topps Co. Inc., features a photo of Washington from the waist up in his green Jets jersey with his arms folded across his chest -- and appearing to make obscene gestures with each hand.

Washington said yesterday that there was nothing naughty about the photo, which was taken during a shoot with Topps a few months ago. He said he was making an "E" with both hands to honor his home town, but some fingers are hidden under his armpits.

"All it is is that I'm from the east side of Jacksonville -- that's my community," Washington said. "It looks funny, but maybe I should've taken the picture a different way. That's all it really is -- nothing more than that."

The apparent obscenity has increased the popularity of the card, which is fetching nearly $100 on eBay, and Topps is offering collectors the chance to return the card and receive another in its place after saying its release was an oversight by editors.

All Blacks v. France: 18th November 2006 - video highlights

Not quite as convincing as the previous week's thumping, with the All Blacks falling into their notorious 'third-game slump', but still enough to overpower the French comfortably, despite this opening try from the home team...



Leon McDonald atoned for his fumble that gifted that first try to the French with this line-break that lead to a try from Josevata Rokocoko (despite the attempted foot-trip from his opposing winger, and knees-in-the-back from a late-arriving Frenchman)...



And, finally, Ma'a Nonu justified his selection at second five with a relatively simple try, served up by a nice Dan Carter pass...



Location: Stade de France, Paris
Final Score: France 11 - All Blacks 23

Own Goal scores again!

Real Madrid are through to the final 16 of the 2006 European Champions League, thanks to a 1-0 victory over Steaua Bucharest.

"Own Goals" - top scorer for the "Beleaguered New Zealand Knights" (their new, official title) - turned out recently for Steaua Bucharest in their clash against the Spanish football mega-club, and with the help of Steaua defender Banel Nicolita, scored the winning goal in the 70th minute with a deft back pass that went straight into the back of the net.

Here's the moment of horror...



We have but one question? Just what was the goalie doing? Praying to Mecca in the middle of a game?

Australia v. Great Britain: 18 November 2006 - video highlights

Video highlights of the final round-robin game of the 2006 Rugby League Tri-Nations, with Great Britain needing to beat Australia to book their place in the final (at the expense of the Kiwis).

The Aussies were having none of that though, and trounced the Poms, rubbing salt into the wound with an extra-time length of the pitch classic...

{hooray - actual TV commentary!}



Final score: 33-10

Ireland v. Austalia: November 19, 2006 - video highlights

A fantastic win for the in-form Irish Rugby team, beating the Australians by a record home margin (with the biggest Irish winning margin being a 27-12 thumping of the Aussies at Ballymore in 1979).

Anyone fancying an Irish v. All Blacks final next year? (This would require, according to my calculations, the Irish to win their pool, which would result in the AB's probably playing France in the quarterfinal, and then both teams winning their way through to the final from there).

{Warning - yet another with a LOUD rock soundtrack}

Highest one day partnership. Ever.

Indian schoolboys Shahbaz Tumbi and B Manoj Kumar knocked up a partnership of 721 runs for the opening wicket in an under-13 forty overs inter-school match at Secunderabad in southern India on Wednesday.

The article states they were playing St Philip's High School, who were bowled out for 21 in the run 'chase', but fails to mention whether the St Philip's pupils were, in fact, blind, eight year olds, mentally retarded, or all of the above.

Apparently they broke three records with the stand: surpassing the previous highest stand record of 664 (held by batting superstar Sachin Tendulkar and Vinod Kambli) as well as the highest total and highest margin of victory - in any form of limited-overs cricket at any level.

From the BBC article...

Staff and pupils at the school have not stopped celebrating since the record was set on Wednesday.

The school band is almost more exhausted than the cricketers after playing tune after tune in honour of the young heroes.

Twelve-year-old Mohammed Shahbaz Tumbi and his class mate B Manoj Kumar were playing as openers in the under-13 school cricket tournament of the Hyderabad Cricket Association.

Shahbaz scored 324 runs - with 57 boundaries - off 116 balls.

His partner and close friend Manoj scored an equally scintillating 320 runs - with 46 boundaries - off 127 balls.

A whopping 77 extras meant that the total from their partnership went up to 721 runs for no wicket.

Interestingly not a single six was hit during the trail blazing innings.

Early nomination for Sportsmen of the Week, perhaps?

Can't see Ma'a Nonu trying this any time soon.

You're a pack of arseholes

Another classic blast-from-the-past from YouTube...

The 1992 Bathurst race ended in controversy when a downpour turned the racing surface into a slippery slide, causing a raft of crashes, including that of the lead car at the time, a Nissan Skyline driven by Jim Richards and Mark Skaife. The race was called off early, and victory given to Richards and Skaife, much to the displeasure of the Aussie crowd, who reserve their support almost exclusively for Holden or Ford cars.

Jim Richards, being a straight-talking kiwi bloke, responded to the crowd's jeers with this infamous outburst...

You're a bunch of arseholes!

Apparently this incident spurred on the creation of separate races for the V8 Supercars (V8 Ford and Holdens), and 2ltr Supertourer (everything else), the details of which can be seen over at Wikipedia. (The passion and feeling fans of motorsport have for these topics is perhaps best demonstrated by the fact that something as relatively simple as the history of a race can be flagged as 'neutrality disputed' in the online encyclopedia).

The Dropkicks - Episode 32

The latest podcast is now up!

This week's episode is bought to you by the letter O (for awesome) and the score line of 47-3. In their usual mix of low information content and possibly entertaining buffoonery, the Mallet, the Mouth of the South and Sideline Mike discuss international rugby results from around the world, including the big matches from Dublin, London and Lyons; the stadium controversy in Auckland; a bunch of other stuff that's probably completely meaningless; some reader mail; another new Dick of the Week; another new Athlete of the Week; before finishing up with yet another Last Word.

Episode 32 (right click, save target as...)

Tana's big welcome at Toulon

You can't actually make out Tana in the footage, but this footage of the crowd welcoming the ex All Black captain to the 2nd Division French rugby side Toulon is amazing. The stadium is chocka. The fans chant, throw confetti, and generally go nuts. Apparently games are now sold out weeks in advance thanks to Tana's presence.

And for a second division team. Imagine the Bush getting this sort of support!

All Blacks v. France, November 11th, video highlights

Just about the complete performance from the All Blacks, with some superb handling in the wet and slippery conditions, combined with rib-crunching defence that kept the French scoreless except for one consolation drop-kick.

The French may well be foxing a year out from the World Cup, and either had no Plan B (or didn't want to reveal it) once Plan A (up and unders towards the AB's back three) had gone out the window, but, whatever the case, it was a joy for All Black's supporters to watch. Here's a few of the good bits...

England v. Argentina, 11 November 2006: video highlights

Not the full highlights reel, in fact, just the two very good tried scored by the English in their 18-25 loss to Argentina at Twickenham over the weekend.

Update - found a full highlights package, but, unfortunately, with a very dodgy heavy metal sound track. TURN SOUND DOWN BEFORE PLAYING!

And Sackey's try is a joy - nearly Rokocoko like with his silky running...

Kiwis v. Great Britain: 10 November 2006: video highlights

All the tries from New Zealand's emphatic win over the Great Britain rugby league team at WestpacTrust Stadium in Wellington on Friday night, including Ruben Wiki's freakish try: a little chip kick from Stacey Jones bounces off the crossbar of the uprights, and falls into a grateful Wiki's arms.

Final score: Kiwis 34 - Great Britain 4, keeping the Kiwis hopes of making the Tri-Nations final alive (dare one say, "go the Aussies!"?).

36 balls, and still no-one can score...

From the UK Sun...

AN FA Cup game grinds to a halt after pranksters throw 36 balls on to the pitch.

Play in Walsall's match at Macclesfield last night had to be suspended for a few minutes when the brightly-coloured balls were lobbed from outside the ground over the roof of a stand.

Kids from a nearby estate were blamed for the jape 55 minutes into the televised first round match.

Ex-England ace Paul Ince, boss of League Two strugglers Macclesfield, joked: "They will come in handy. We've only got about eight for practice sessions."

Despite the extra balls no one could score and the match ended 0-0.

Jerry Collins v. The French Defence

Would you want to try and bring him down...?

"I know that sounds sexist but I am sexist."

Following Luton's 2-3 defeat to QPR in England's Division One League over the weekend, Luton Manager Mike Newell decided the female line assistant was to blame...

She shouldn't be here. I know that sounds sexist but I am sexist. This is not park football, so what are women doing here? We have a problem in this country with political correctness - bringing women into the game is not the way to improve refereeing and officialdom. If you start bringing in women you have big problems. It is tokenism for the politically correct idiots.

Replace 'women' with 'blacks', and 'sexist' with 'racist', to better highlight the sheer idiocy of this statement.

Needless to say, all hell is broken loose in the UK media, Newell has since apologised (or not, depending on how you read it), and it now appears his job may be on the line as a result of his outburst. Idiot.

[Update: one of the better commentary pieces on the affair has been written by Zoe Williams over at Guardian Unlimited.]

Willie Mason - Dick of the Year?

Ah yes, it wouldn't be a sporting week without some new piece of idiocy from everyones favourite kiwi-born Aussie league A.D.D-affected doofus, Willie Mason, this time giving Britain's Stuart Fielden a punch that broke his nose and dropped the unlucky Brit to the ground like a bag of spuds during the Poms 23-12 win over the Aussies at Sydney on the 4th of November at Aussie Stadium in Sydney.

According to Willie Mason (via BBC quotes of the week) this was the provocation that caused the blow...

He said 'Come on you ******* Aussie ****'. I said '**** you, you Pommie ****wit'. He said 'Let's go, let's go, I will belt you, you Aussie T***'.

And, thanks to the magic of YouTube, here's two different television angles of the 'biff' for you...




End result: Mason banned for only one match and fined $5000.

Gracious Losers

A couple of nice quotes from the French rugby management after their 47-3 demolition at the hands of the All Blacks over the weekend. First, Coach Bernard Laporte...

There's nothing to be said. They were far superior - they are much better than us. We thought we'd be a bit more competitive than that. We feel very inferior. They are playing a better game. We were completely impotent really in terms of our commitment and they really did want to play hard.

...and Manager Jo Maso...

We were flooded by a tidal wave. We met a great side, with superior athleticism and class, and we were not up to it. It was a failure.

Ireland v. South Africa, 11th November 2006: video highlights

Final Score: Ireland 32 - South Africa 15.

Ireland: Tries: Trimble, D Wallace, Horan, Horgan; Conversions: O'Gara 3; Penalties: O'Gara 2.
South Africa: Tries: Steyn, Habana; Conversion: A Pretorius; Penalty: A Pretorius.

{WARNING: no commentary, just loud music.}

All Blacks v. England, 5th November 2006: video highlights

A record margin. Tries galore. Dan Carter being his usual awesome self. Enjoy...

The Dropkicks - Episode 31

The latest podcast is now up!

This week it comes to you via the Dynamic Duo. No, not Batman and Robin. No, not Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson. No, not even Batwoman and Batgirl. Look. It's Hadyn "Mouth of the South" Green and Sideline Mike, OK? Happy? Well, you should be. Neither Dom "The Mallet" Gibbs nor Che "Tall Timber" Tibby could be with us this week, so the Mouth and Sideline have to make do. This week we talk, well, bollocks mainly. But we also talk rugby, athletes, dicks, wackies, etc, etc. The usual stuff.

Episode 31 (right click, save target as...)

Hire a stadium?

A letter in this morning's Dominion Post got me to thinking about the "Stadium Aotearoa, ouwww" debate. $700m (or $500m depending on which report you read) for a stadium that'll probably get filled to capacity maybe a couple of times a year does seem a bit extravagant. As one barely coherent caller to Murray Deaker on Sport Radio managed to articulate between a series of neanderthine grunts: "think of all the hip operations that could fund!"

Ah yes, the old 'hip operations' argument. What did the whingers do before hip operations became common place?

Anyway, this letter suggested hiring Stadium Australia, and snarkily remarked that the savings made on construction could be used to fund the flying of the NZRFU, Helen Clark, Trevor Mallard and co. across the ditch to watch the Final.

Which got me to thinking, why not just fly all the Kiwis who want to see the final to Australia? How much would it cost?

Let's assume we're shifting 40,000 people (I assume people from Aussie and overseas can get their via their own steam). Current cheap return airfares to Sydney from Auckland are about $650 a pop (and remember that Air NZ is the official All Blacks airline, so there may be discounts in the making there as well). Pull a number out of a hat for the Stadium hire - $10m. Assorted costs, whack another $10m on there. So...

Airfares: 40k x $650 = $26,000,000
Stadium Hire = $10,000,000
Miscellaneous = $10,000,000

TOTAL: $46,000,000

That's under one-tenth the cost of building the thing, everyone gets a holiday in Sydney, and we don't end up with a white elephant sitting on the waterfront at Auckland. And I'll take a 10% commission from the savings made, thank you very much.

Photo of the Year

The IRB has announced that this photograph by Morgan Treacy of the INPHO agency in Ireland has won the inaugural IRB/Emirates Airline Rugby Photograph of the Year Award. (click for larger version)


Morgan Treacy/INPHO - IRB/Emirates Airline Rugby Photograph of the Year in the IRB World Rugby Yearbook 2007

“The picture was taken after a lineout had been lost and captures the look of despair and exhaustion on the face on the mud covered player. It also clearly shows that emotion and drama is not confined to the professional ranks, but can also be found in the amateur Game where the weekend player, like the one in the picture endure difficult conditions with little or no reward, except for the love of the Game”

Gyroball?

Daisuke Matsuzaka's gyroball ...or is it?

Episode 30

The special “bonus cast” we recorded last Friday night down the pub is still going through its own technical hitches. But here, with no glitches at all, is this week’s cast (right click, save target as…).

And it’s a ghoulish Halloween affair featuring Dom “The guillotine” Gibbs, Hadyn “mouth of the south full of sharp teeth” Green, Dead-Ball-Line Mike and all put together by James “Noiz-ombie” Guthrie.

We review international rugby of varying quality, have a roundtable discussion of the IRB’s new rules, throw you a bit of Japanese sport wackiness, Athlete and Dick of the week and Dom reveals his favourite word. We cap it all off with a BRAND NEW competition!

Episode 30 (right click, save target as…)

Movember

UPDATE: The 'Guess the Mo' competition is now online. Click here to enter.

Tena Koutou,
Today is the first of Movember and as such it is the first day of life for our new moustaches. We'll be growin 'taches for the entire month (the month formerly known as November). But why am we telling you about it? Prostate cancer and money.

Basically there is a formal sponsoring system through the (completely above board) Movember website. By sponsoring a 'tache you not only make a statement about men's fashion but also about health. and to make it sweeter all donations over $5 are tax deductible!!!

How do you do it?

• Go here
• enter "the dropkicks" into the team name box
• then pick which of us you want to sponsor and your credit card details. (Again the site is completely above board)

The money raised by Movember will be used to create awareness and fund support networks for those that suffer from prostate cancer.

You can also track our mo's progress (and the progress of my 'tache teammates) here on the blog (eventually, the photos will be up very soon).

Cheers
The Dropkicks

ps. This post is basically us asking for your hard-earned money, and we do feel a little stink for doing it, but it is for a good cause dammit!

pps. below are some bad stats about men's health.

Male health is a major issue, did you know:

• Men are far less healthy than women. The average life expectancy of males is 6 years less than females.
• Every year in New Zealand about 600 men die of prostate cancer – about the same as the number of women who die from breast cancer.

More info is available at www.movember.com.au

Movember is run in partnership with the Prostate Cancer Foundation of New Zealand.

Thanks to Rugby Pioneers for the photo