The Paris Hilton: A great place to get banged up

The Dropkicks are keen as beans for the World Cup to roll around, as we're sure you all are as well. While the heartland well and truly pounding one another is always a worthy spectacle, we're looking forward to the sights and sounds of Paris being sent down the wire to us here in good old Enzed.

Mind you, what we won't be able to experience first hand are those intangible things. The food. The wine. The nightlife.

To compensate we're doing our best by trying to consume some good cheese, drink some good wine, and ponder the meaning of life in cafes.

It's a tough job, especially when you have to deal with stinky cheeses named "Artisanal". But someone has to carry the can.

After all, we reckon the All Blacks will like to know that we're not abandoning them to their fate their in Paris, city of lights.

The Dropkicks have been a little concerned however, especially since discovering this video. The questions we asked ourselves being, "what in the hell is this all about?"

and

"Wtf is that giant white dome thing?"

and

"Are the All Blacks being asked to sleep in a big tent for the duration of the cup?"

Watch for yourself.

Now, there's no sound... so... what the hell? What happened to the Hilton?

We did read somewhere that it's some kind of expo tent for New Zealand. Being Kiwis, and always insecure about our place in the world, someone is bound to half-fill that tent with helium, and have a few dozen people in "Steinlager Green" T-Shirts and jandals running about yelling "Kiwis aeh! We're ok!" in little squeaky voices.

Anyone who can confirm or deny that wee cultural cringe, or WTF is wrong with that video, is welcome to comment.

The Dropkicks - 2007 - Episode 24

The Dropkicks look back at the final and deciding game of the 2007 Tri-Nations series; the All Black selections for the upcoming Rugby World Cup; follow Scott Dixon's ongoing winning ways in Indy Car racing; corruption in the NBA refereeing circles; a moments silence for Jarrod Cunningham; and Dick and Athletes of the Week.

Download Episode 2007/24.

Yes. We had to get in on the act.

In the spirit of Te Wiki O Te Reo Māori we here at Dropkicks thought we'd bring you a little Te Reo.

A really little Te Reo.

In fact, a little, gingery, squeaky Te Reo.

Now, apparently every man and his dog has seen the video we're linking to, so, we, in the spirit of good humour, have decided to put it up here on the blog. Just in case your the only person who hasn't seen it yet.

Now, this does not mean that we endorse confectionery haka.

No. If some smart-arse tries to turn Te Kapa O Pango into a bunch of liquorice allsorts prancing about like they're gunna pwn the candy store... the Dropkicks will be calling the PC-Police.

This is our man here, to your right.

And why I hear you ask?

Because the Dropkicks take the Haka very seriously.

Almost as seriously, in fact, as the Tongan team shown below (about 40s in).


These guys know that the Haka is not to be trifled with.

And no... no friggin dancing trifles either...

So here's the video. Two million hits they reckon!

Stats-porn

Some stats from this weekend's match between the All Blacks and the Wallabies.

New Zealand gave up 5 penalties to Australia's 13!

NZ’s penalty offences:

Tackle (going off feet) = 1 (Robinson/McCaw)

Ruck (offside entry) = 2 (Woodcock/Oliver, McAlister)

Scrum (binding) = 1 (McCaw)

Obstruction/taking out player = 1 (Robinson/McCaw)

Australia's penalty offences:

Tackle = 4

Ruck (offside) = 2

Ruck (hands) = 1

Offside (general) = 2

Lineout (offside) = 1

Scrum (binding) = 2

Throwing ball away = 1

And now the all important First Three to the Breakdown
(* means they were a sub)

First 3 to Breakdown
McCaw	33 (15+18)
Hayman	30 (18+12)
Robinson	28 (16+12)
Jack	28 (13+15)
Woodcock	24 (12+12)
So'oialo	20 (7+13)
Collins	11 (4+7)
Mealamu*	9
Howlett	9 (5+4)
Oliver	7 (5+2)
Muliaina	7 (2+5)
Carter	6 (1+5)
Kelleher	5 (4+1)
McAlister	4 (1+3)
Toeava	4 (1+3)
Rokocoko	4 (1+3)
Evans*	1

For the complete stats go to Tracey Nelson's column on Haka.co.nz

Sweet Baby Jesus

Look, I'd like to say right now that I have a lot of respect for Byron Kelleher.

I really would.

But. I can't.

Frankly, while the guy might on the good day be on the ball like a fat man on a sandwich, this type of theatrics just plain pisses me off.

Look at him there, singing his little heart out. Woodcock is there too, saying, "Bloody good on you mate. Wrong words, but good on you for trying." Muliaina is kind of leaning away from Byron there though, and thinking, "Shit, busted on camera with this guy. Again."

But it is the anthem after all, a time for passion and damp eyes out there in the freezing rain when you know you're going to hand the Wallabies their arses on a plate.

The haka is something different though. Why in the hell TV cameramen insist on showing this idiot is completely beyond me...

Note to self guys, the haka is not about enthusiasm. Any damn fool can be enthusiastic.

The haka is about inner strength. It's about te wehi, the awesome power. It's about the frickin' eye of the tiger. That look that says, "I'm going to completely demolish you, your team, your coach, the team masseur, and that guy there carrying the water. Yeah... and just you try and stop me..."

It's not about some bloke waving his arms like an albatross before bursting into tears.

So do us all a favour and stop showing this embarrassment before every game. Focus on someone... anyone... but this. Please.